Hi Readers, I hope you are having a lovely Memorial Day weekend. I know where I am it is sunny and gorgeous outside. Granted, I can only see the beautiful weather as I seethe with envy from inside the library and school buildings. No, that is an exaggeration; I am in a more positive mood than I let on. You see, my comps are only a Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday away. I cannot believe that they are already here. But, I have studied, I feel pretty prepared, and I know that all of the hard work will be worth it afterward when I have at least a solid week to relax. My only concern is that the reason I feel ready for them is not so much that I feel solidly prepared to ace them, but that I really just want them to be over, for better or worse! My younger sister was an absolute angel and spent three hours with me yesterday calling things out and patiently waiting through my several tantrums, frustrations, and epiphanies. Sometimes it really does help to have company while you study. Or it does for me, at least.
On a sidenote, my sweet, sweet L (whom I have been tutoring for three years) graduated high school on Friday! I cannot tell you how proud I am of her, and how much she has accomplished. She is off to college now and I am having a very strange (perhaps maternal?) feeling as she is "all grown up" now! I'm going to miss our weekly sessions, but I could not be more happy for her. And we had a wonderful dinner on Friday night to celebrate this accomplishment.
So anyway, I just finished my 6th or so practice session for comps. Knowing the material is only half the battle, as you have to have a great deal of stamina to write without stopping for 3 hours, break for an hour, and then do another 3 hours. That second 3 hour session is what is going to get me. Not to mention day 2 of the same schedule. What is crazy is that even with the 3 hour time block, I have found that I still have trouble getting out all of the information I need to get down. Last weekend I wrote for the solid 3 hour practice session and when I finished I had 10 solid pages written (single-spaced), yet there was still information and examples I didn't get down. Got to keep working at it, I suppose.
I am currently impressed with my will power to say no (something at which I am truly awful). I hate saying no to people whether it is something fun that I want to do or something not-so-fun that someone asks me to do. However I have currently said "No" to the following things:
1. Babysitting (very tough; I hate turning people down)
2. A weekend at the LAKE with friends (that one really, really stung)
3. A different weekend by the POOL with other friends (oh, the pain)
4. Dinners/drinks with friends (not as difficult as 2 and 3, but still unhappy)
I have also noticed that many things which I usually value highly have become less important to me. For instance:
1. Personal appearance (showering and brushing teeth are about as good-looking as I've been getting)
2. Neat and tidiness (my closet is full to bursting with odds and ends that I don't have time to find a real place for)
3. Physical activity (I don't think you can get more sedentary than studying 6-10 hours a day)
4. Social interaction (my phone is always on silent and I have only been enjoying the company of textbooks)
5. Sunlight (I am so pale it looks rather sickly--in need of a spray tan)
6. Positive impressions (I think I have worn the same outfit like 3 days in a row, or at least variations of it--whatever I can find that is clean is what I wear without regard for matching, etc.)
7. Speaking in complete/articulate sentences (a lot of that is due to the social isolation one)
However, I am just grateful that I have wonderful friends and family who have been urging me on and supporting me, and an amazing boyfriend who is okay with the fact that we haven't had a legitimate conversation in over a week due to the studying/work/phone on silent/sleep deprivation schedule. Thank you all for your sweet thoughts, prayers, and well wishes. Friday at 4pm I'm reclaiming my life :)
Casey
No comments:
Post a Comment